The 3 Critical Stages To Conquer Any Upsetting Change

Here is the fastest route available to dealing with difficult change:

1 – Awareness

This is the stage where you realize the reality of what’s happening around you. This is where you understand the impact and consequences that change has brought.

2 –  Acceptance

This is when you realize that what’s real is real and thinking about it or wishing it wasn’t true doesn’t actually improve anything. You can’t go back in time and this is the turning point when you adapt to reality and become ready to move on.

3 – Action

This is the stage where you are back in motion. You are moving with the waves and toward a new destination or vision. Even if you don’t have a vision yet, you know you have to start somewhere and this is you in motion.

It’s these critical 3 steps that you must move through unpredictable or difficult change.

That’s it.

Now that you know, it’s up to you to figure out how to move faster through them.

How to do that?

Identify the phase in which you take the longest amount of time, and start there.

2 Minute Action

For me, it’s the second step that takes the longest. I, like many others, tend to ruminate on what could be, what I could have done, or what I should have done. Reflecting and analyzing is helpful, but ruminating and dwelling is non-productive and time-consuming.

What’s your weak point out of these three?

Reply, forward, comment, and let me know!

The more we share these weaknesses, the better able we are to address and strengthen them.

Why I Love Haters

Let’s talk about haters.

Haters are the 2%-5% of people who just can’t be pleased, entertained, soothed, or fixed.

There’s nothing you can do about them.

Don’t confuse this with feedback.

People who complain are often offering you valuable feedback, even though they might not do it in a respectful way.

It’s your job to avoid taking things personally and listen objectively to what they’re saying.

Sometimes you can’t fix it and sometimes you can.

The point is, you’ll know when you’ve got a hater because this is the person who just wants to complain or “get a rise” out of you.

But you know better.

If you focus your energy on haters, they will absorb all of it.

If you focus on feedback, you will continuously improve.

The punchline is that when you meet a new hater, you’ve given an opportunity to grow.

When you meet a new hater, you’re given an opportunity to choose to make the world better.

2 Minute Action

How about a random act of kindness, today?

It only takes 2 minutes or less.

Text someone. Leave a post-it note. Send a gift.

You have everything you need to make the world just a little bit better.

Why Minimalism Isn’t Right

Do fewer, more impactful things.

I bet you’ve heard some version of this before, so let this just be a reminder.

The idea isn’t to get you to stop doing what you’re doing or to ask you to start some new way of doing things.

Consider this a reminder.

Here are some examples:

Warren Buffet knew he didn’t have the time or resources to invest in everything or even a lot of things. So he picked a few companies that were highly likely to succeed and tripled down on them.

Herb Kelleher knew that Southwest Airlines couldn’t compete with every airline in the industry. So he picked a few routes, a few customers, and delivered exceptional service. He won customers for life and has become one of the most profitable airlines in history.

Jim Collins did a study of some of the top companies in the world and wrote a book about what he found. He found that companies who had the “Hedgehog Concept,” the idea that they knew “one big thing,” were monumentally more successful than companies who knew about a lot of little things.

Those of you who have been following me know that I preach all the time about “minimalism” and the value of living and operating within one’s means.

Really, it’s not minimalism. Honestly, that word just sounds like I’m a smelly, raggedy hermit or something.


By focusing on what matters, you can avoid what doesn’t.

That means letting go of bad things, small things, as well as good things and pretty good things.

As Derek Sivers coined: “Hell yes, or no!”

2 Minute Action:

What are the essential, non-negotiables in your life and work right now?

What are the things that, if you didn’t do them, nothing bad would happen?

What are the things that, if you didn’t do them, something bad would happen but nothing catastrophic would happen?

I’m not telling you what to do–I’m just asking questions that you can ask yourself to help guide your actions.

Comment, reply, and let me know what things you think you can stop doing and on what you think you might need to double down.