Tell Me You Don't Already Know The Answer To This . . .
We almost always know the answer already. The trouble is that we're looking for someone to give us permission.We don't need a new fancy diet. We know what's good for us and what's garbage. Eat less, exercise more.We don't need a fancy new software app. We know what work we're avoiding. Do the scary stuff first, push everything else aside.We don't need a professional life-coach. We know what's right in our hearts. Care more, complain less, solve problems that help people.
But there are consequences.
The trouble is that caring more means we get hurt by careless people.Complaining less means doing the emotional work of reframing frustration as gratitude.Solving problems that help people means we have to deliberately look inside ourselves--which is can be terrifying.
So, it's going to hurt either way.
It's up to you whether you want to feel the hurt of being yourself or the hurt of never being you.It's up to you if you want to endure the temporary pain of vulnerability or the sustained suffering of self-denial.The thing we often know and often forget is that we're going to habituate to whichever pain we choose.To which pain would you rather be immune?
2 Minute ACTION:
- What work are you avoiding right now?
- What conversation are you putting off?
- What habit are you waiting to start?
Reply/Comment and let's get moving.
The Only Time Complaining Works
Let me be crystal clear:
Complaining is a failed attempt at processing what's you're going through.Complaining is explaining the pain you're feeling through rumination.Analysis of this granularity is only helpful if you're going to find a solution.Complaining is never helpful if complaining itself is the end goal.Catharsis is a fallacy. Don't "get it out of your system."All this does is train your brain to get better at complaining. The more you do anything, the better you get at it. It's called neuroplasticity and it's your brain's ONLY job. It's good at this, too.Unless you can verbalize the pain of your experience to reveal some nuanced truth that provides perspective or meaning, it's a useless expenditure of energy.There is a 0% ROI on complaining.The only way to be an amazing person is to train your brain to have awesome patterns of thinking. If you're serious about your life and career, you'll promise yourself you'll stop yourself the next time you're bitching to a co-worker or partner. Stop and choose to look for something positive you can do instead.It's very rarely a bad idea to be in a positive mindset.Promise yourself this. We need you.