How To Bounce Back From Failure Consistently

You know the feeling.You let yourself down.Or maybe you let someone else down.

It can be a weird combination of feelings including but not limited to:

• Guilt
• Shame
• Embarrassment
• Sadness

The problem with this isn’t messing up.

The problem isn’t that you feel this way, either.

You don’t get to choose how you feel.

The problem is what happens afterward.Do you beat yourself up?Do you ruminate?Do you avoid the future?

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:

There is a 0% Return-on-Investment for ruminating.Do what you need to do to bounce back.Go for a walk. Go to the gym. Go scream into a pillow.That part varies from person to person.What we’re doing now is focusing on speed to recovery.How fast can you bounce back?

2 Minute Action

Take a second to reflect on what has been a successful resilience strategy for you.One that has been very effective for me is reframing my current situation with gratitude.It took me 30 years to learn this, but now I’ve got it.I feel more bullet-proof than ever.(Example: no matter how bad it is, I’m not getting shot at, I have my conscious brain, I have a bed to sleep in, I have food, etc.)If you’re serious about self-improvement you will figure out what makes you more resilient and use that when facing adversity.You can leverage this when life gets hard!All the information you need is already in your head, all you need to do now is DO something with it.

Just Put Your Shorts On

There are some strange things that happen when you try to change yourself.

 

And I'm not talking about the slow rate of progress or the big payoff--I'm talking about the disappointments, the injuries, then setbacks and the feelings of pain, uncertainty, and frustration.

 

Of course, you may have noticed that I haven't posted or written any content in about 4 or 5 weeks. It's not because I was taking an intentional rest or a deliberate retreat.

 

I fell off the horse.

 

I just stopped writing.

 

But that doesn't matter.

 

You know what I'm going to say next, right? It's not the incremental success that actually improves us. It's the ability to get back in the saddle with confidence that you are who you say you are.

 

It's the relentless mindset that makes us travel in the direction of our dreams.

 

We often over estimate what we can accomplish in a year, but massively underestimate what we can accomplish in ten years. In the end, it's the decadal time-scale that really matters--not the fact that we fell off the horse a few times.

Yet, this is often the reason we quit.

 

It's just so easy to forget about the long-game because days will always seem longer than years when we're in the middle of a workout, a breakup, or a career setback.

 

Having a relentless mindset means zooming out, looking at the big picture, and jumping back in the game anyway. Having a relentless mindset means accepting the embarrassment of falling down in front of others and getting back up anyway. Having a relentless mindset doesn't mean we're immune to pain, frustration or self-doublt, it means we're committed to the process of moving forward despite these adversities.

 

2 MINUTE ACTION:

 

What's something you quit or stopped doing recently? Writing? Learning a new language? Practicing an instrument?

 

What's something you can do in 2 minutes to get you back in the game?

 

How about writing a 5 sentence blog post? How about listening to a song or podcast in another language? How about picking up the guitar or sitting down at the piano and playing along with 1 song on the radio?

 

The funny thing about resilience is that the action itself isn't the hard part. It's not running or lifting weights at the gym that's hard--it's putting your shorts on.

 

I bet, once you put your shorts on and get back in the game, you'll surprise yourself how quickly you'll pick up where you left off.

The Only Thing That Actually Matters . . .

It's not talent, or opportunity, or luck.In fact, it's not any of the typically desired characteristics or things.The only thing that matters in your career, life, or productivity is your ability to get up again.If you can get up again and again, you'll win.You'll learn the rest along the way.For now, get comfortable with the process of getting up over and over and over.