Read This If You Have To Get Over It
Tough things are tough.
There are things in our control and out of our control.
Sometimes distinguishing these helps us handle tough things. Sometimes it doesn't and tough things are just tough anyway.
Here are the 3 stages of handling tough things.
Awareness
Being aware that there is a problem is part of it. Being aware of the entirety of the problem is the rest of it. What are the consequences? What is the full breadth of the problem? Once you see the whole thing, we can move forward.
Acceptance
This might be the most psychologically difficult one. For the most difficult problems, not accepting that this is now part of your story and part of your life could seriously hinder your ability to recover.
At this point, there's no choice involved. You're either going to say "yes, this happened and it's now part of me" or you can try another workaround.
Action
Only after you are aware of the full problem and you accept that it is part of your journey, can you fully take whole-hearted action.
And that's exactly what you need to do. This is where you can assess if you can repair, mitigate, or bounce back. You might only be able to do one of those.
2 Minute Action:
The first, smallest step might not be the repair, mitigation or resilience. The first, smallest step might be compiling all of your resources.
If you're still in shock, you may want to talk through what happened with a trusted advisor until you can think straight again.
If you're overwhelmed and don't know what to do next, you might start googling "what to do when x happens." This might not give you the answer, but it might help you reboot your creative juices again.
If you know what to do, you might call an accountabilibuddy to keep you on track and accountable to your solution.
All of these things can happen in 2 minutes.
You know, marathons start with just a few steps (and all that).
It's cheesy but it's true. I believe in you.
How To Get Past Your Breaking Point
It might be hard to describe now but you know what it's like when you're there. Your breaking point is your breaking point. You didn't pre-set this. It isn't up to you, but the way you get past your breaking point is what will separate the new you from the old you.
Sneezing.
Coughing.
Headaches.
Achey and sore muscles.
The question isn’t whether or not you’re sick, the symptoms are clear, it’s “how hard do I push myself?”
After trying both the “rest and relax” and the “push through it” camps of thought, there is really only one conclusion:
You need to find your limits.
Not "know your limits." That can only happen after you FIND your limits.
This means pushing yourself to the edge and let's be real . . . it's going to hurt a bit.
This is another one of those “unpopular beliefs, but it has served me well.
Push yourself until you break. Let yourself recover.
Now you know:
- You’re not made of glass
- Where your limit is
Without getting to the edge, you will never know if you could have pushed through it
Getting past the breaking point will give you the confidence to approach it again and again.
And it will inform the intensity and duration of your next mission.
The Navy Seals have a 40% rule.
Once you get to the point where your body tells you “I just can’t go on,” you will know that you actually have only gone 40% of the distance you’re capable of going.
When your body is screaming, you actually have 60% left in the tank.
Understanding this rule is a keystone in living a mentally tough life.
2 Minute Action
Set your timer.
Everyone has 2 minutes, that’s why this little segment exists after every one of my blog posts.
Theres no excuse.
I bet you can do push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups or burpees for 2 minutes straight.
This is a physical example but the skill is transferable to other facets of life.
Big things are made up of lots of smaller, actionable things.
2 minutes is plenty of time.
Let's start Monday off right.
If you loved reading this, click here to get more posts like it in your inbox every day.