The Secret Benefit of Crappy Situations

I was boarding my plane and I couldn’t help it.There was nothing I could do.I got sick right there on the jetway.I took a knee and let everyone pass by me.They escorted me out and denied me for flying.

I feel awful.

My whole body hurts.

But do you know what I thought of immediately afterward?

I was thinking of how grateful I am that this isn’t that bad.I’m sick and I have to pay for an extra room/night—I’m not dying.I’m grateful for how my team executed our latest project.I’m grateful that Southwest treated me with respect and kindness and rescheduled my flight at no extra cost right on the spot.I even was reminded of Veteran’s Day and all the folks who have done the hard work so I can make the impact I want.I know this was a little weird to be thinking about while my stomach was turning in knots—but that’s just the point.

I haven’t always thought this way.

It’s been a habit of remembering that when things suck, it’s actually not that bad.There is a 0% return on investment for complaining.There is an immediate benefit of feeling gratitude.

2 Minute Action

What’s something that sucked recently?How might you zoom out or reframe this to see the big picture?Gratitude can happen by itself, for sure, but you can also make it happen with just a little more effort.The benefits are huge.Just think!You have the power to turn lots of crappy situations into positivity!

The Only Time Complaining Works

Let me be crystal clear:

Complaining is a failed attempt at processing what's you're going through.Complaining is explaining the pain you're feeling through rumination.Analysis of this granularity is only helpful if you're going to find a solution.Complaining is never helpful if complaining itself is the end goal.Catharsis is a fallacy. Don't "get it out of your system."All this does is train your brain to get better at complaining. The more you do anything, the better you get at it. It's called neuroplasticity and it's your brain's ONLY job. It's good at this, too.Unless you can verbalize the pain of your experience to reveal some nuanced truth that provides perspective or meaning, it's a useless expenditure of energy.There is a 0% ROI on complaining.The only way to be an amazing person is to train your brain to have awesome patterns of thinking. If you're serious about your life and career, you'll promise yourself you'll stop yourself the next time you're bitching to a co-worker or partner. Stop and choose to look for something positive you can do instead.It's very rarely a bad idea to be in a positive mindset.Promise yourself this. We need you.