Chris Danilo

View Original

The Secret, Unharnessed Power of "No."

The price is too high.I can't commit to that timeframe.You can't be serious with that offer.

It doesn't matter if it's a hostage negotiation, if you're buying a used car, or if you're convincing your boss that your idea is actually her idea . . .The words "no," "can't," and "won't," are just starting points.They're not the end of the conversation, they're the beginning.If your goal is a win/win situation, you won't get there with just "yes" and you won't get there by bullying.It requires empathy which means doing the work to truly understand your counter's point of view.Just to be clear:

  • A compromise is a lose/lose strategy.
  • Bullying is a win/lose strategy.
  • Backing down and just saying "yes" is a lose/win strategy.

2 Minute Action

Before you agree to any terms today, legal or personal, ask why the terms are the way they are.You might just learn what your counter-part values enough to both get what you want without compromise.